As with all things in life it's about reaching a balance.

We live in a society where so many parents generally ignore their kids. I will constantly see parents walking off down the road with a child following 5-10 meters behind. I think some people think that children should do this or do that but when the kids don't it's the kids fault. Children are a blank slate, any behaviour good or bad is something that they pick up from their environment. I'm constantly catching myself doing or saying things that I have to correct myself doing because I don't want that behaviour (that I picked up from those around me) to be passed onto my kid.

I don't necessarily think you can't be a child's BFF, part of raising children is defiantly discipline but that can generally be taught via example and guidance. Taking out a whip to get someone in line may work in the short term but long term learning is about instilling behaviours that are reinforcing to the outcome you wish.

I think the point he's trying to convey is that like everything in life you get out what you put in. You can't be upset at a teenager for bad behaviour if that's all they have been exposed to. It's also about breaking cycles. It's not good enough to turn around and say 'well that's how I was raised', it's about thinking 'how was I raised? how can I do it better?'.

I'll definitely agree that raising kids is the hardest and longest thing you'll ever do (doesn't end at 18!).